I Am Caleb. Hear Me Roar.

Sometimes, I get angry.

Now, this doesn't happen too terribly often, though there are a select few that get me regularly riled up, and it is usually short-lived. But when I am truly angry, everyone knows. There are several stages to my anger, and they basically go like this.

It always starts with my Oh My God, Did That Really Just Happen face. If my anger was caused in person, it is usually accompanied by some uncomfortable laughter. Sometimes I'll actually say "Oh my god, did that really just happen." This face, easily recognizable by my friends, is my immediate response to any external stimulus that makes me unhappy. It comes in many forms, though, like the Stank face (Snarl-like lip, like I'm smelling something foul on you) or the You're An Idiot face (Raise one eyebrow, lower the other, purse lips, like you just said something stupid because you probably did just say something stupid).

Soon after, it gives way to telling absolutely everyone who will listen exactly what happened. For me, negative emotions are not a personal thing. I think my brain has the idea that if I share my anger, sadness, or pain with everyone around me it will eventually disperse until all of its power is gone. It works well, usually, to be honest, as long as I don't get in trouble for not shutting my mouth soon enough. At this point, someone inevitably tries to do the stupid thing and tell me how they see the other side of the story, which gives way to the next stage.

Now that someone has pointed out to me that I could, in fact, be a human and I could, in fact, have flaws, and that the situation might have, maybe, just a little, been my fault I fold in on myself and begin having self-esteem issues about my problems and how it was all my fault and why doesn't anyone love me and he started it but he wouldn't have started it if I had just been better, tried harder, had fewer flaws, and of course we fought and everyone should fight with me and I'm going to go to the gym.

Eventually I get over it, usually that day unless it was a particularly grievous offense, and I move on with my life. I completely forget about when I was angry at the person until the NEXT time I'm angry at them, at which point I decide that the previous times had been bothering me from the beginning. Each progressive time my anger is directed at a person the mood swings get bigger and the stages get more intense. By the fifth time, I'm making chimpanzee faces, putting the story on the local news, and buying a ten gallon tub of protein powder.

And this, my friends, is just another reason why i'm insane.

Do these mood swings make me look hipster? Because I'm working on changing them! I can totally change, just give me a chance! I've been going to the gym and every-- no, don't leave! Please, no! WHY, GOD, WHY?! Oh, hey, Glee's on.